Other Musings

Catching up on the headlines…

I’ve had a long week at work. The type of long week that leaves you feeling like it’s Groundhog Day, waking up each day crying into your coffee with a futile hope that it will be Friday. Well, since today is in fact Friday, I decided to give myself a reprieve and catch up on some of the newsworthy topics I missed this week. After seeing some of these headlines, I couldn’t help but share a few of my thoughts.

(Photograph: Indigo/Getty Images via The Guardian)

Prince Harry was caught with his pants down in Vegas. Oh, wait, they weren’t just down they were nowhere to be found. Suspiciously enough, neither was a single item of clothing of his female companions. While all those prim and proper are screaming “SCANDAL,” I have to ask – why is anyone feigning surprise? You mix a 20-something testosterone-filled ginger with unlimited wealth, subtract any and all responsibility as you’ve stuck his brother with that (and a pretty British princess) and send him to VEGAS? I mean, really. Nudie pictures are child’s play. I view this as a victory, old chaps! Can’t we just be happy he didn’t get rufied, steal Mike Tyson’s tiger and/or adopt a stripper’s baby. Ok, sure, he probably made a few babies, but keep calm and carry on folks. That is your motto, is it not?

Oh, Lancey Pants. What a shame. Whether you did or not, your legacy is now going to be reduced to that cyclist guy who left his wife for shacked up with Sheryl Crow and liked to run shirtless alongside Matthew McConaughey. Shattering a man’s entire reputation and stripping him of his legacy seems a wee bit harsh, USADA. However, as someone who admittedly hasn’t had much free time to read up on the matter and is therefore not informed enough to make a judgement, I offer the following compromise:

Cancer = Significant disadvantage
Brain surgery = Significant disadvantage
Chemotherapy = Really significant disadvantage
Doping = Significant advantage

How about we take away mehhh, say three or four of those SEVEN titles? Surely the man deserves a few wins for enduring testicular cancer and brain tumors and still WINNING? Quick someone call Charlie Sheen. I suspect the expert on #winning while on drugs will be the next natural bromance in Lance’s life. After all, Lance needs a slew of celebrities he can cozy up to and sweat alongside to get him through.

A man tried to rob LL Cool J in his own home, while LL was sleeping. I’d love to know what would posses someone to think it is a good idea to burglarize the home of a rapper who’s song repertoire consists of titles such as “Mama Said Knock You Out.” What the hell did you THINK would happen? Did you think you were going to prance on in his mansion undetected, threatening the safety of the family of a man who makes his living off of being a straight up bad ass? The only thing more broken than your nose, face and ribs should be your pride, you freaking fool. The potential 38 years in prison you could serve is for your own safety. LL would kill you if you didn’t have the walls of a jail cell to protect you from the wrath of his bulging biceps and sexy six pack.

And with that, I’ll leave you with this parting shot for which there really are no words.

(kimkardashian.celebuzz.com)
 

So long sweet summer…

Summer is coming to a close. The days of heat stroke inducing humidity are retreating and soon we will no longer have to live in fear of pit stains at every turn. We can put away the bikinis, short shorts and other assorted skin-baring clothing in exchange for Fall’s wardrobe of pants, long-sleeves, jackets and scarves.

While my inner fat kid is rejoicing at the impending lack of dietary restrictions which go hand in hand with the lack of bikini-wearing, I can’t help but lament the fact that summer has gone by so quickly. There was so much I wanted to do that will have to be tabled until next summer or hopefully, squeezed in during the little time we have left!

Well, we’ve only got a few weeks to go, so let’s make the most of it…by staring at some awesome summer-worthy outfits. As we prepare to bid adieu to a heat record breaking summer, let’s make the most of our seasonal favorites, show some skin and break some head index records of our own!

Here are some of my favorite short-shorts looks. All of you who have gams worthy of such baring, wear away:

So long summer...
So long summer… by kerrychannon featuring shorts
 

Olympic Memories

As I sit here flipping through the television channels, lamenting the lack of athletics available to me on my regularly scheduled TV programs, I contemplate watching YouTube videos of the Fab Fierce Five and the US Swim Team. Yes, I fully admit, I am going through Olympic withdrawal, which is no surprise considering my previous confessions of Olympics addiction. I quietly shed a tear as I watched the Closing Ceremonies on Sunday, mentally setting the countdown for Rio.

As I reminisce of my favorite memories from the Olympics, I can’t help but share a few of my thoughts:

  • Team Fencing would be way cooler if it was just one massive sword fight. Whoever is left standing wins gold.
  • I never thought the words badminton and scandal would make it into the same sentence. As if they didn’t have enough work to do defending the sport.
  • The number of US swimmers and gymnasts who won medals and are still in high school is awe-inspiring, yet slightly depressing for the rest of us. They’ve accomplished more before graduation than the rest of us will accomplish in our entire lives, but McKayla Maroney is still not impressed.

  • Oh, and the Spice Girls are like a fine wine. They’ve only gotten better with age (…and botox, breast implants, nose jobs and other assorted plastic surgeries).
  • And speaking of the closing ceremonies, the irony of Jesse J cruising around in back of a Bentley singing “Wanna make the world dance. Forget about the price tag.” is not lost on us, London. I’d want to forget a $14.5 billion price tag, too.
  • Kerri Strug, you’ve been one-upped. Sure you vaulted with an injured ankle, that takes some determination. Manteo Mitchell ran 200 meters with a broken leg. Sorry, Kerri, your reign as the best broken-limbed Olympic athlete is over.
  • Sanya Richards-Ross is a woman after my own heart. I consider anyone who can win gold while wearing Chanel a role model.
  • And, while we’re on running. Oscar Pistorius is without a doubt the most inspirational athlete that ever was.
  • Who run the world? GIRLS. The United States women won 29 gold medals; the United States men won 17. Womp, womp.
  • And, last but not least, Nathan Adrian, where have you been all my life?

I’ll leave you with that closing thought as we all wait for Rio – and perhaps another dose of Nathan.